Hey there, Leah from Couple Health with some thoughts for you today. 

In my therapy practice, I’m blessed to see a lot of patterns and dynamics play out between couples, and I wanted to share one idea with you today ...

If you want a great relationship, get into the Friend Zone.

It’s an ingredient that is often missing at the start of a sizzling relationship.

Let’s say I have a close friend who is also my roommate --

Do I really expect them to pick up my dirty socks and underwear? To cook every meal? To buy birthday cards for my family, and clean the toilet, too?

Of course not! Funny-not-funny, but when romance is in the mix, we often lapse into a form of amnesia around issues of fairness, negotiation and civility in domestic life -- not to mention play, exploration or - god forbid - eroticism.

Objectively, it doesn’t make much sense… I gather with my friends to laugh and smile, to share my time and my energy. We plan our next outing, we make time for each other, we are intentional in maintaining our relationships. 

Why don’t we naturally do this with our romantic partner?

Cultivating this aspect of intentionality can be a fabulous way to provide relational nourishment, and show appreciation and love. 

How can you put your partner in the Friend Zone today?

How can you show this level of fun, spontaneity or appreciation to your partner?

Think of one thing, and go and act on it before you forget. 

Be well,

Leah Valian